The Midnight News 6.05.01 

Posted By Hyatte on 06.05.01

Raw, Ryder may be onto something, Piper, Tajiri, and Eh-Dee 

Sigh.... okay, time's a'wastin. Be sure to see the story on Bret Hart and the WWF.... because there's a real twist in there that as of right now, no one has picked up on yet

NOT RAW, BUT PINK ON THE INSIDE

Monday Night Raw was on last night.... and there were two big moments in the first 15 minutes. Hugh Morrus showed up to screw up an IC title match and Minnesota Governor Jesse Ventura showed up to screw around with Vince McMahon.

The Undertaker gave one of the best promos of his life when he came out and demanded that whomever’s been hassling his wife come out. He got in JR's face and slapped the cap off Paul Heyman's way too bald head.

It was all in all, a hell of a show. Those two "Hot shots" in the beginning really helped sell this as a "special" Raw where something cool was going to happen. Nothing cool really did, but the show was still good.

PK handed in the 411 The Recap scant minutes after the show. Faster than friggin' anyone.

EDDIE SUCKS (the pipe?)

The Torch has reported that Eddie Guerrero, who was supposed to take on Jeff Hardy in the King Of The Ring tourney last night, was sent home by the WWF for being "in no condition to perform".

In fact, they say Eddie was more F-ed up than Shawn Michaels EVER was.

As of 2:30 am, EST, the WWF home site has not announced the termination of Guerrero, but the WWF Locker Room is said to be "in a panic" over this and Brian Lawler's recent firing. They seem to think that maybe their will be a major crackdown on all drugs.

Remember the movie Class? Where the students think there is a Narc investigating them and they jammed the toilets flushing their various stashes down the toilet? Well that's pretty much what's going on in the locker room right now.

BOB RYDER VS THE WORLD

Call this the "24 Hour Rumor".... but there's a twist.

So, Bob Ryder announced that he had WWF sources tell him that Bret Hart is set to lead the WCW "Invasion" into the WWF. Bob says that
"Carl Demarco" who works with the WWF when they run shows in Canada and a close, personal friend of Bret Hart was instrumental in making this happen.

Later on.... The Observer called it utter nonsense, a sheer fabrication, and a total insult to anyone who can read. Bret ain't signed and Bret has no plans on changing this current situation. Meltzer also called Bob a "bald ninny".

LATER on, Ryder showed up again and said that WWF spokesperson, "Judd Everhart" (EverHART??????) absolutely refuted the story and said that Bret Hart has NOT signed with the WWF and there has been NO discussion between the two parties. Ryder swears his story came from not one, but TWO very credible sources. Bob also said that Dave Meltzer reported in his Newsletter that Carl Demarco was trying to contact Bret. 

Still later on, Meltzer popped back in and said that sometimes, sources lie! (Yeah, so which "source" told Meltzer that Kevin Kelly was giving radio interviews?") He further went on to ask that Ryder no longer include him- Meltzer- in his web of irresponsible rumor mongering lies.

Now, HERE'S IS THE TWIST.... something that leads me to think there is MUCH more to this story.... 

Go to Bret Hart.com and it will take you directly to WCW.com. 

So, until we get a universally agreed upon explanation.... no one gets any points given or taken.

Part of me hopes Bob gets busted here.... I still remember all the times he and Dave Scherer used to blast Scoops for Al Isaacs wrong reports.

PIPER'S SPIT

My friends (okay, that may be a lie) at RF Video posted a whopping two part interview with Roddy Piper. The first part dealt with how Piper is trying to help the old timers out while running like hell whenever Ken Patera comes within 5 miles of him looking for his money. The second part.... well, why don't I just recap select bits from the whole magilla? 

-He explains that the "Blackballed Video" was conceived when he tried to come up with a way to show the world what it was like to live inside a wrestler's head 24/7. He wanted to convey the reasoning behind why he and Kerry Von Erich were standing on a six inch ledge on the 8th story of a building with the window shut and had to be pulled in by the Big Bossman and Curt Hennig. Why Kerry Von Erich killed himself a few months later. He wanted to explain how it is working in a "corporate world" that wrestling has become and why it has one of the highest suicide rates in all of sports. He wanted to convey all that.

-Piper explains that they tape stemmed from a ceremony he attended where he was honored by the "Cauliflower Alley Club" in Las Vegas. The speech he gave at this ceremony was so moving that a man donated 44 acres of Vermont land to build a Medical Facility for Wrestlers and Boxers. The tape ended up being a way for the viewer to understand what a wrestler is and how the business uses them, then disregards them like trash.

-Piper doesn't want to start a Union.... he thinks there should be a "Player's Association".... something that can take care of all these guys who fought like "warriors" back in the day! (like "warriors"? So a ton of 3 minute no-sell matches?). He says that the tape will show us why guys like Rick McGraw, Rick Rude, Bruiser Brody, Art Barr, Kerry Von Erich, and Adrian Adonis aren't with us anymore. 

-Says that he enjoyed booking his first card.... says that Greg Valentine still "scares him" (?? what about his shirt that read "No Fear"? MORE LIES??? MORE PROPAGANDA???)

-Says that he met Sabu for the first time, and said that Sabu has "the sickness". Says that the "sickness" is proportionate to the manipulation of the promoter.

-Says that the tape will show the slimy underbelly of the business. It was will explain just what goes on backstage (uh oh.... sounds like Patterson's in for some headaches).

-Piper knows why Kerry Von Erich killed himself. He will explain why in the tape.

-He says that some kid, a 19 year old asked his advice on doing promos. Piper told him to go to school and save his money. He says that the chances are "one in a million" that a youngster will become a "lifer". Says that no one wants to hear him preach. (Ironically.... the kid took Piper's advice too literally and is now on the Indy circuit cutting 45 minute promos on how Lincoln freed the slaves and how to ask for a pair of white shoes in Spanish)

-Piper wouldn't recommend anyone to enter the business today.... he went back to the need for a "Player's Association" for full time veterans, not guys like George "the Animal" Steele who teaches school most of the year and only worked during the Summer.

-His book is called "If You Are Gonna Die Kid, Die In The Ring. It’s Good For Business". He swears he didn't make the title up. He said a Promoter said that to him one night before a match when he was puking his guts out from food poisoning. He said the promoter had a piece of roadkill on his head that was a toupee.

-He says it's not an autobiography.

-He talks about his lawsuit against WCW... how he sent a private tape to Bischoff and Russo explaining how to save WCW. No one ever responded back to him about it, and later on, he was fired for being incapacitated with a torn bicep. Piper insists that he was not incapacitated, in fact just two months before he was canned, he had just spent two and a half hours wrestling people at a Portland Wrestling School, and one of them was an "Ultimate Fighter". 

-He said that in his book, he doesn't "kiss and tell" on anyone but himself. (WELL, cancel MY order)

-He told the interview "God Bless" and the thing ended. (My God! Piper's gone religion!!!)

I want that damn tape... someone buy it and send me a copy. You OWE me that much after years of faithful Mop-Ups!!

WHAT IF YOU'RE A GUY WHO DOESN'T LIKE MOVIES?

Earlier last week, 1 Wrestling said that the WWF were talking to the people a WTBS about putting WCW on their air.... again. The deal didn't pan out.

Now, RF Video is reporting that the WWF is denying having talked to TBS and would NOT talk to them even if they promised to jerk all their shows 5 minutes ahead of everyone just to screw with competing shows! (err... guys?)

RF Video thinks this is all hogwash. They think the WWF DID talk to TBS, but tried to do it on the DL, so their friends at Viacom wouldn't find out about it. (Vince planned on breaking into all the Viacom employees houses and smashing their cable and satellite dishes with a sledgehammer.

Either way, TBS will be wrestle-free. After years of Thunder, I imagine they are quite used to that. (HAW!!!)

Finally, RF Video also reports that Tajiri will wet his feet in some WWF July House Shows. The push for him will be very slow building. (Yes, and that strategy worked so well for Steve Blackman, Albert, Kai Entai, Essa Rios....)

BUT, PLUGS

Like I said, PK showed up with the 411 RAW recap href="http://411wrestling.com/tvreports/headlines/47.shtml">fast as can be

Meanwhile, Tom Daniels has popped up with another href="http://411wrestling.com/columns/headlines/80.shtml">Cheap Heat. This one talks about criticism of Steve Austin and why he's going to be a good Heel.

Craig Letawsky also showed up answering YOUR questions about.... Jesus, just href="http://411wrestling.com/columns/headlines/81.shtml">read "Ask 411".

As for me, well, I decided to take the week off from And Another Thing here, but I sent The Smarks an old column called The Road: New Meat. Let's see if they post it.

There IS a new Mop-Up coming this week. I promise.... (cough).

and finally....

TAKE US HOME, HONKY

On recent WWF signings:

Seems Booker T. and Fagwell, I mean Bagwell has signed with WWF. Booker T can bring a lot of talent to the table as far as the WWF needing diversity. Fagwell, I mean Bagwell, he brings nothing as far as I am concerned. He will be a locker room problem and a crybaby. This is one of those guys that has never worked without a contract and when it gets too tuff, he will be out with an injury. Come on J.R. stop signing these guys you kept on WCW payroll when you were booking there 10 years ago. Bagwell, I mean Fagwell is a bust. You heard it here first.

And, of course, on Jerry Lawler:

Lawler says he turned down an offer to return to the WWF. He says without his "teenage queen" he will not return. Please give us a break. Can Lawler be that much in love or is it after 30 yrs in the business, he really believes she has this incredible talent the WWF needs. He goes on to say J.R. wasted a first class plane ticket by asking him to come to the office. Could this have been done by phone? They should have put the king in coach, back around seat 38C, there is a small room there with an odor fit for a King.

ahhhh.... nice.

This is Hyatte